


Recovery

by halfpastmonsoon



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Communication Failure, Gen, M/M, Post-Canon, Roommates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-20
Updated: 2018-10-20
Packaged: 2019-08-04 20:00:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16353308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/halfpastmonsoon/pseuds/halfpastmonsoon
Summary: Komaeda moves in with Hinata after waking up post-game, and they try to start again.





	Recovery

**Author's Note:**

> So I wrote this a long-ass time ago, probably sometime in 2014? All I added now was the last few sentences, since it was unfinished. If people want me to, I can try to continue this, but obviously I'm not sure what younger me wanted exactly. Personally I think it holds up, which is why I'm posting it to begin with. Enjoy!

‘I don’t deserve this.’  
‘What are you talking about?’

I sighed and stopped what I was doing, that is preparing a meal, and turned around to look at my roommate, who was sitting on his bed and staring straight at me. I shuddered slightly under the gaze.

‘I don’t deserve your kindness, Hinata-kun’ was the explanation.

Oh, fuck no. I looked back at my hands and thought for a moment.

We’ve been living together for a bit over a month. Komaeda was convinced I was forced to take care of him, and, truth be told, that’s how I explained the situation, fearing that the actual reason is not something he should share too quickly. Actually, I wasn’t forced to do that at all. I volunteered, in fact, which I still found unbelievable. Someone had to look after this guy, for countless reasons, and for some reason, I wanted that someone to be myself. Back then, I didn’t want to admit that he found Komaeda interesting, ever since I first met him. Living together was the perfect opportunity to get to understand him...at least in theory. In all actuality, after such a long time, a lot was still unknown. That was mostly my fault, admittedly. I didn’t want to bother Komaeda too much with questions so fast, as I was afraid that my curiosity might be a bother. I still wasn’t sure how this guest felt about me, and I didn’t want to take any risks.

At that moment, though, I was wondering if I should tell Komaeda the truth. Perhaps he felt like such a burden since he didn’t know I actually wanted him around. Even I wasn’t sure why that was the case. The guy was annoying, confusing, sometimes even terrifying. I always wanted to get mad at him over things he kept doing, but it was impossible. Was it pity? No, not exactly. Whatever it was, it was odd and hard to explain.

I made the decision. Tearing my focused gaze away from the hands, I turned around and left the kitchen. I stood in the middle of the bedroom and looked at Komaeda again, suddenly hesitant. I clenched my fist to the point where it hurt, but I didn’t mind, or notice at first. He looked at me with certain degree of curiosity and a smirk on his face, waiting patiently for whatever was coming.

‘Why do you think you don’t deserve this? I’m not even very kind to you’ I muttered at last, looking at the floor.

‘Ah, you see...’ Komaeda didn’t hesitate to reply, still smirking ‘I know you didn’t take me in out of your own will. Nobody would want to deal with me non-stop, after all! Yet you aren’t complaining. Even though I’m useless to you, and nothing but a burden, wasting your time every day, you never even so much as make nasty comments! You make me food and buy me books and spend time with me, even though, I’m sure, even someone like you would have better things to do.’ He fluttered his eyelashes and crossed his arms, now looking at the floor as well. ‘I don’t understand why you seem to...ah, no, it’s impossible for you to actually enjoy this, what am I even thinking. But you don’t seem to mind, and I can’t understand that, Hinata-kun.’

I bit my lip. It hurt to listen to that. It always did. It’s hard when no matter how much you like someone they will never believe you. That was undoubtedly one of the most frustrating things about Komaeda.  
I decided to sit cross-legged on the floor in front of him. Komaeda looked at me with a mildly surprised expression.

‘Hey...remember when I told you that I was made to take care of you? That I...was ordered to?’  
He nodded carefully, not taking his eyes off my face.  
‘That was a lie.’

The surprise on his face was not mild anymore. He raised his eyebrows above his eyes, now opened extremely wide, along with opening his mouth in the shape of an ‘o’. That, however, was just a split second. He shook his head slightly and put on a pretty neutral face.  
‘What?’ he asked so quietly I barely heard him. I gulped and prayed to God that I wouldn’t stutter.  
‘I wanted to have you here, Komaeda.’  
He blinked really fast and looked at me in disbelief. Here we go again.  
‘That’s impossible, Hinata-kun. You’re just trying to make me feel better.’  
I hid my face in my hands in a fit of frustration. I sighed heavily, stood up and sat next to Komaeda.  
‘I’m not trying to make you feel better. I’m just telling you the truth. Believe me’ I raised my hands defensively and crossed my heart with one of them to make sure Komaeda knows it’s not a lie.  
‘Then...’ he looked away from me and fell back onto the bed ‘assuming that’s true, why? First of all, I’d like to know what made you lie to me at first? And second...why? Why did you...want me here?’  
I shivered and tried to stand up. ‘I have to make food, Komaeda. I can’t just keep it out like that.’

He gripped my wrist and looked at me seriously. ‘I’m not hungry. It can wait. The questions, however, cannot. Answer me, Hinata-kun.’  
‘Let me at least put it away, okay, I swear I’ll be back in a second.’  
He let go of me and rolled over to the side, away from me. I sighed. That was a bad idea, after all.

I skipped towards the kitchen, put everything away, and walked back into the room. I looked at him for a moment, and my heart dropped. Such a weird person he is. I still don’t understand him. I never will, probably.  
I plopped down onto the bed, lying next to him, facing his back.

‘Komaeda. Look at me. Please.’ I whispered that and waited. After a moment, he turned towards me. His face was still serious, but curious. It seems like while I was away, he kept thinking about it.  
He was waiting for me to talk. I inhaled.  
‘Look,’ I began, trying to both look him in the eyes and avoid looking at him at all, ‘I didn’t tell you because...’ I bit my lip for a second ‘if you found out, you would have protested, wouldn’t you? Saying it’s an order that came from above made it sound serious. I thought you’d prefer that, for some reason. Sorry.’ I closed my eyes and inhaled before looking at him again. He was biting his lip absent-mindedly, and still looking at me curiously.

‘You went to such great lengths to make sure you’d be my caretaker. It’s...amazing, in a way, but I still don’t see why. Aren’t I just a bother, Hinata-kun? Your life would have been much easier without me, I mean. So why?’ he looked like a little child at that moment and my heart dropped again.  
‘I was curious, I guess. I wanted to get to know you better after...all that happened.’ His face went a bit pale for a moment, and then flushed for another moment. Strange. ‘I guess that’s it.’  
Suddenly he smirked, and then started to giggle. That weird giggle of his that always scares me a bit, but is oddly charming. I didn’t understand what’s so funny, but I just let him laugh, my face flushing a bit. I’m sure I had a silly face, but it’s not like he was looking at me.

‘Hinata-kun,’ he said, tears rolling down his cheeks (was it really THIS funny?), ‘we’ve been living together for over a month now. And you’ve never asked me any questions or even implied you want to listen to me like you did back then. You call that curiosity?’ he was smiling in that condescending way of his. I wasn’t sure what to say so I just looked away, still blushing.  
‘I wasn’t sure if you wanted me to ask so soon...or at all.’ I finally managed to spit that out. I bit my lip again, nervously, and I felt it bleed. Whatever. He was giggling again. I felt a touch on my hair and I looked back up in shock just to see he reached out to my fringe. He took his hand back in a moment and rested it on the bed between us.

‘Ah...well. At least that explains some things, I suppose.’ He smiled that close-eyed smile that always calmed me down. ‘You should know, Hinata-kun, that your behaviour wasn’t exactly inviting, either. But I always thought that’s because you don’t want me around. Now I see that you were busy making sure I have everything I need, and also...’ he opened his eyes again ‘as awkward as always.’  
He sat up suddenly and stretched, revealing his stomach for a good few seconds. I sat up as well.  
‘Well, uh...’ I started ‘we can always make up for the time we lost.’  
His eyes opened and looked at me as he raised his eyebrows.  
‘I think...we can start getting to know each other better.’  
‘Hmm...yes, that’s certainly a good idea. Better late than never, I suppose. Do you have any specific ideas?’  
‘I think there’s a good way of doing that...at least it might work.’  
He was staring at me in anticipation.  
‘How about...truth or dare?’  
He blinked a few times, considered the idea, and snorted cheerfully.  
‘Sure. That can work. Should we start now?’ he seemed excited. In comparison, at least. I couldn’t help smiling.  
‘Yeah, I guess. Unless you’re hungry.’  
‘Still not.’ He kept smiling, but I couldn’t tell what he’s thinking.  
‘Anyway...truth or dare?’  
‘Ah...truth.’ He laid down in bed again and I had to turn around to be able to see him.  
‘Uh...what’s your favourite colour?’ that was the first idea that came into my head.  
He giggled, but started thinking hard. Was it not a simple question?  
‘Every colour can be beautiful, Hinata-kun. But I’m particularly attached to’ he looked me in the eyes ‘greens.’ I couldn’t help wondering if he’s referencing the colour of my eyes, even though it was such a weird thought. I still ended up blushing a bit. Goddammit.  
‘It’s your turn now. Truth or dare?’  
‘Truth’

We kept going like this for some time, until we got tired. We decided that we’re just going to ask each other questions, since neither of us wanted to pick dare. I suggested that we should do that for a few minutes every day, and he agreed. Now I could finally get back to my cooking, and he fell asleep almost instantly.  
A few weeks passed and I was getting to know him better through this little game of ours. He learned about me, too, but I don’t think I’m really an interesting person. To him, though, I apparently was, since whenever it was my turn to talk, he would just rest his chin in his hands, smile gently and look at me. One day, though, it took an unexpected turn.

‘Hinata-kun...’  
‘Yeah?’  
‘Are we...friends?’

I didn’t expect this kind of a question from him. I wasn’t sure, I was NEVER sure what we were, even though we were on good terms, better than ever and better than what I expected. I looked away from him, deep in thought, and started absent-mindedly biting my fingernail.  
‘Yeah,’ I said after a while ‘I guess we are.’

His face lit up, he looked a bit like he was going to cry, but instead he just smiled. I had to admit that was sort of an adorable reaction. After a moment, though, his smile dropped and his eyes went wide. I instantly got worried, but I didn’t get to ask what’s wrong.  
‘I don’t deserve this.’  
‘Are we really doing this again?’ I was kind of frustrated, but mostly scared. His expression became somewhat judgemental...great. I was too dense to understand something again, probably. I hated such situations, but I hated it when he was this vague even more.  
‘You forgot already, didn’t you?’ his voice was calm, a bit too calm for a situation like this. ‘You shouldn’t be friends with me, and you know why.’  
Here we go again. Before he got to make yet another speech on his lack of worth, or his bad luck, or whatever else he wanted to say, I interrupted, talking a bit too fast, probably.  
‘I don’t care. I like you. I thought we were friends already. Stop making this out to be some sort of a tragedy for me. I don’t care about what might happen later.’

I expected that it wouldn’t convince him with something so simple. I should have made a long, passionate speech, but I was never good at these. Instead I just smiled at him awkwardly, which was met with the expression he always makes when he’s heard something he doesn’t want to. He was biting his lip, narrowing his eyebrows slightly. I kept wondering if he wanted to argue or not, until he finally spoke up.  
‘Are you absolutely sure you know what you’re talking about?’  
‘Yes’ I answered instantly. Any hesitation could have been lethal.  
‘Then,’ his face lit up again, but I couldn’t tell if it was genuine or not ‘I suppose I can’t argue with you, Hinata-kun. You are quite stubborn when it comes to this, so there is no point in trying to convince you it’s a mistake, now is there?’ he leaned back with his hands behind his head and stared at the ceiling. ‘Now all I can do is wait for the ceiling to fall and kill us,’ he said that with a smile and started giggling, which sent chills down my spine. God damn it.

The bed wasn’t really big enough for the both of us to be comfortable in it, but I decided to lie beside him on my side. He looked at me with certain curiosity. I looked at him with a mixture of worry and frustration.  
‘I don’t understand this,’ I whispered ‘I should be mad at you, I really should. But I’m not, even though you are doing everything to confuse me.’ I carefully reached out and put my fingers in his fringe, petting his hair slowly, and messing it up further. ‘You asshole.’

He smiled softly and rolled over so we were face-to-face. When I took my hand out of his hair, he hid his face in my chest, in some sort of weird fetal position. I wasn’t sure what to do, so I just wrapped one arm around his waist. God, he was so fragile. I heard that he was trying to say something but I couldn’t hear words. I asked him to repeat, and he pulled away from me. I felt confused and hurt, but I didn't push further, just watching as he rolled onto the other side, away from me.

'Goodnight, Hinata-kun,' he hummed softly. I sighed and closed my eyes. There's always tomorrow. And the day after.

One day, I will understand.


End file.
